Tech Humor
Best Tech Humors:
Three engineers are riding in a car: an electrical
engineer, a chemical engineer, and a Microsoft engineer. Suddenly the car
stalls and stops by the side of the road.
The three engineers look at each other with
bewilderment, wondering what could be wrong. The electrical engineer, not
knowing much about mechanics, suggests, "Let's strip down the electronics
of the car and try to trace where a fault might have occurred."
The chemical engineer, not knowing much about
electronics, suggests, "Maybe the fuel has become emulsified and is
causing a blockage somewhere in the system."
The Microsoft engineer suggests, "Why don't we
close all the windows, get out, get back in, open the windows again, and maybe
it will work."
Just received this and want to share it with
you:
In a surprise announcement today, Microsoft President
Steve Ballmer revealed that the Redmond-based company will allow computer
resellers and end-users to customize the appearance of the Blue Screen of Death
(BSOD), the screen that displays when the Windows operating system crashes.
The move comes as the result of numerous focus groups
and customer surveys done by Microsoft. Thousands of Microsoft
customers were asked, "What do you spend the most time doing on your
computer?"
A surprising number of respondents said, "Staring
at a Blue Screen of Death." At 54 percent, it was the top answer, beating
the second place answer "Downloading XXXScans" by an easy 12 points.
"We immediately recognized this as a great
opportunity for ourselves, our channel partners, and especially our
customers," explained the excited Ballmer to a room full of reporters.
Immense video displays were used to show images of the
new customizable BSOD screen side-by-side with the older static version. Users
can select from a collection of "BSOD Themes," allowing them to
instead have a Mauve Screen of Death or even a Paisley Screen of Death.
Graphics and multimedia content can now be incorporated into the screen, making
the BSOD the perfect conduit for delivering product information and
entertainment to Windows users.
The BSOD is by far the most recognized feature of the
Windows operating system, and as a result, Microsoft has historically insisted
on total control over its look and feel. This recent departure from that policy
reflects Microsoft's recognition of the Windows desktop itself as the
"ultimate information portal." By default, the new BSOD will be
configured to show a random selection of Microsoft product information whenever
the system crashes. Microsoft channel partners can negotiate with Microsoft for
the right to customize the BSOD on systems they ship.
Major computer resellers such as Compaq, Gateway, and
Dell are already lining up for premier placement on the new and
improved BSOD.
Ballmer concluded by getting a dig in against
the Open Source community. "This just goes to show that Microsoft
continues to innovate at a much faster pace than open source. I have yet to see
any evidence that Linux even has a BSOD, let alone a customizable one."
True story from a Novel Netware
SysOp:
caller: "Hello, Is this
tech support ? "
Tech: "Yes, It is. How
may I help you ?"
caller: "The cup holder
on my PC is broken and I am withing my
warranty period. How do I go about
getting that fixed ?"
Tech: "Did you say a Cup
holder ? "
caller: "Yes ! it is
attached to the front of my computer"
Tech: "Please excuse me
If I seem a bit stumped, It's because
I am. Did you received this as
part of a promotional,
at a trade show ?"
caller: "It came with my
computer, I don't know anything about a
promotional, It just has 4X on
it."
At this point the tech rep had
to mute the caller because he couldn't stand it He was laughing too high.
The
caller had been Using the load drawer of CD-ROM drive as a cup holder and
snapped it off the drive.
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